When the commercial for TV One’s Uncensored came on and Tamar Braxton said the words “I’m not angry I’m hurt” those words snatched my attention. Not sure what I was doing when I heard that but I know I stopped what I was doing and started typing. So many women walk around with hurt and pain and it’s perceived as anger. We are then labeled as the angry black woman when really, in fact, we’re the hurt, bruised, women that are in pain and trying to mask it daily. We mask it when someone asks us how we’re doing and we respond “I’m good, how are you?” we mask it when people ask “how’s everything going” and we answer “it’s going well” knowing that it’s not.
That hurt makes you keep your mouth shut in regards to those hurtful situations you have experienced. Or it can make you think that no one wants to hear about your pain. It makes you think that you should be shameful for the situation. It makes you feel as though you did something wrong.
We all know what hurt looks like but we all miss label it. We watch it on TV daily and we call it entertainment. We share it on social media and brush it off by saying things like “that’s just her being her” or “girl you know she crazy.”
When in fact hurt looks like that girl that throws a wine bottle across the table not caring how much damage she may cause. Hurt looks like that woman that deals with any & everything that her man brings to her. Mainly, so she can say that she has a man and to try to prove to everyone else that she can be loved no matter what her past looks like. It looks like that woman that is never satisfied and happy with her looks so she constantly makes changes because someone hurt her by telling her that she wasn’t beautiful the way that God created her.
You know hurt comes out when you least expect it and it typically makes you target a person that has nothing to do with the root cause of your pain.
When hurt comes out of her mouth the words sting, they’re painful, they’re below the belt, and they’re uncaring. When the hurt is not dealt with properly and handled to completion it destroys. It destroys relationships, friendships, and careers. Hurt is a destroyer but when the pain that comes from hurt is healed it can be a teacher it can be a lesson for not only the person that went through the pain but for those that hear your story.
There is beauty in the pain and those hurt situations but it’s not typically seen until the story is told and you are healed.